My recent post about fiction book bags as Christmas presents proved very popular so here another one about creating non-fiction book bags for blokes. (Book bags for ladies coming tomorrow.)

First up, how to sew a fabric bag for a book. There are very clear instructions here on the Design Dazzle website.

I did some research and found out what some of the most popular hobbies for men are. Here are book bag ideas based on those.

 

1. Gardening

First up, a couple of ebook suggestions:

The Garden Seed Saving Guide. To go with this – pair of gardening gloves, small trowel, small flower pots, sticky labels.

Preparing a Garden from the Ground Up. All of the above gift suggestions apply as well as packs of seeds.

 

2. Golf

I don’t know a thing about golf apart from that it’s very popular, so I won’t offer advice on which ebooks to buy. There are zillions of ebooks on the subject to choose from. However, some golf balls, socks, tees or a pair of golfing gloves would fill up a book bag for a golfer very nicely.

 

3. Fishing

Again, there are lots of books out there to choose from, but this looks interesting – Fishing – Learn from the Tips and Laugh at the Tales. Into the book bag go some hooks, flies, line, disgorger, lures, small bags of boilies etc – the list of little fishy gifts is endless.

 

4. Flying

Pilots might enjoy Thunder in the Tummy, a collection of funny true tales by a pilot.

Youngsters thinking of learning to fly will benefit from this book, Teenage Pilot.

Suggested book bag goodies might be a chart, sunglasses, flying gloves, pilot’s watch, model aeroplane, tie with planes on etc.

 

5. Homebrewing and Winemaking

A promising looking ebook for all homebrewers is Beer and Ingredients here.

And for 99 cents you could add a work of fiction on the subject in the shape of Secret Life of the Brewer’s Yeast: A Microbiology Tale.

I came across one for winemaking which was 582 words long and cost $6.99 so for obvious reasons I won’t be recommending that one. Not the sort of ebook you want to see out there.

Again, there are plenty of little things you can put in a book bag – stoppers, brewer’s yeast, straining bags, funnels, tube brushes, litmus paper, labels …

 

6. Shooting

Here’s a good ebook: Why You Can’t Shoot Straight

Gifts for the book bag would be small targets, old CDs to shoot at, earplugs, safety glasses.

 

7. Geocaching

Exploring With GPS: A Practical Field Guide for Satellite Navigation

And a novel to go with it: Twin Falls

You could pop an old-fashioned compass into the bookbag, but most useful for the geocaching man in your life would be a selection of small items he can put in the caches he finds. What happens in geocaching is that you take a small item from the cache you find after signing the log, and leave something in its place. You could also put in a plastic container with a very tight seal in case the geocacher wants to create his own one somewhere.

 

Hope these ideas help.

Who Put the Eye in the Pumpkin Pie? by Stephanie Dagg

It was Halloween, about half past three,

We were sitting down to have some tea.

Mum had made a big, plump pumpkin pie,

But when she cut it open, she found … an eye!

Now as you might guess, that spoilt the meal

And gave it a very creepy feel.

Suddenly no one wanted to eat

That yummy, scrummy Halloween treat.

Mum went mad, she totally freaked,

She roared, she screamed, she yelled, she squeaked!

She glared at us all to try and see

Who had shoved an eyeball into the tea.

But none of us there had an empty socket

Or eye-gouging tools hidden in a pocket.

We weren’t the culprits, we weren’t to blame.

Was this just some ghastly, ghoulish game?

We wondered quite where to begin,

When the door burst wide and a witch flew in.

She was hunched and so bristly it made you itch,

It was Wicked Wanda, the One-Eyed Witch!

She swooped and shrieked. “What’s this I spy?

You guys have got an extra eye!”

She grabbed it and poked it into place

In her warped and wrinkled witchy face.

No sooner had she left the room

Than a mummy stepped in, fresh from the tomb.

He was followed by bats, a frog and toad,

And the mad professor from down the road.

“Has anyone seen my eyeball bomb?”

He asked. ”The wretched thing has gone!”

As we opened our mouths to tell the truth,

We heard a loud bang from the roof.

We rushed outside, and crikey! Jiminy!

Witch Wanda’s remains were stuck to the chimney!

As her tattered hat floated to the ground

We grimly, glumly gathered round.

So the moral of this tale, my dears,

Is that Halloween can end in tears.

So do be warned, please be advised,

To stay clear of eyes in pumpkin pies!

 

What do you think?

My birthday present from Benj finally made it to France from America. It was a Gelaskin for my Kindle. The design is Almond Branches in Bloom by Vincent van Gogh, my favourite artist.

The gelaskin came on a sheet of card and it was very easy to peel off and stick onto the Kindle. You just need to wipe the Kindle first with a cloth to make sure it’s not greasy or sticky.

I think it’s smashing. It’s not the sort of thing I’d have bought for myself so it’s the perfect present. I shall enjoy using my Kindle even more than ever now!

And on the subject of Kindles, don’t forget you can get my Beat the Hackers for yours from Amazon here!

 

Tweeting (I’m @booksarecool23) has made me realise I am out of touch with cyber slang. Abbreviations are crucial when you only have 140 characters, plus it makes you look more cyber savvy. So, a trawl around on the net and I’ve found this very good guide. And here’s another more Twitter specific one.

Now all I have to do is learn them and remember to use them!

I enjoying translating from French to English.

Our part of France, Creuse, is famous for its stonemasons. In years gone by, the masons left for Paris in spring and stayed there until November, working. They sent money home to their families, who looked after the farm while the men were gone.

Here’s my version of a very famous poem about the masons by Jean Petit, also known as Jan dau Boueix, written in 1855. I’ve kept as close as I can to the original, but here and there I’ve had to resort to poetic licence for the sake of the rhyme!

Enjoy!

You hear all sorts of songs 

In all sorts of styles

About lovers and warriors,

Triumphs and trials.

I don’t want to be boring

And so I will choose

Something new for my song –

The masons of Creuse.

 

On a fait des chansons,  

De toutes les manières,

Des filles, des garçons

Des guerriers, des bergères.

Pour ne pas répéter

Une chose ennuyeuse,

Moi je veux vous chanter

Les ouvriers de la Creuse.

When springtime is here 

They say their goodbyes

To their families and friends

With tears in their eyes.

Their wives are upset

As they bid their adeius

To the men that they love –

These masons of Creuse.

 

Quand revient le printemps, 

Ils quittent leur chaumière:

Adieu amis, parents,

Enfants, pères et mères.

Ah! quel grand désespoir

Pour la femme vertueuse

En disant au revoir

Aux ouvriers de la Creuse.

And so they are gone 

On their working campaign.

They head up to Burgundy,

Paris, Champagne,

Lyons and Bordeaux,

To form building crews.

They’re very hard workers,

The masons of Creuse.

 

Les voilà donc partis 

Pour faire leur campagne;

Ils s’en vont à Paris

En Bourgogne, en Champagne,

Lyon, Bordeaux, même ailleurs…

Ils ont la main calleuse,

Ce sont des travailleurs

Les maçons de la Creuse.

When they’ve arrived 

And have found jobs to do,

Without hesitation

At once they set to.

They’re never unwilling,

They never refuse.

You have to respect

These masons of Creuse.

 

Quand ils sont arrivés, 

S’ils trouvent de l’ouvrage,

Se mettent à travailler

Avec un grand courage,

Sans trop s’épouvanter

D’une vie laborieuse.

L’on devrait respecter

Les maçons de la Creuse.

How the railway lines 

That criss-cross the land

Have caused them backache

And blistered their hands.

The bridges and canals

From the Saône to the Meuse

Have cost them great pain,

The masons of Creuse.

 

Que ces chemins de fer 

Qui traversent la France

Ont coûté de revers,

De maux et de souffrances;

Ces ponts et ces canaux

De la Saône à la Meuse

Ont coûté bien des maux

Aux ouvriers de la Creuse.

They sing as they work, 

Despite their tough role.

They’re happy at heart

And have a glad soul.

Then the season is over.

No more homesick blues,

Because now it’s time

To go back to Creuse.

 

Malgré leur dur labeur 

En travaillant ils chantent

Ils ont la joie au coeur

Et l’âme bien contente.

La dernière saison

Est pour eux bien flatteuse

Pour revoir leur maison

Au pays de la Creuse.

The work is all finished, 

And so in November

The masons assemble

And go home together.

Look at the joy

Of the children whose

Fathers have come home,

Back home to Creuse.

 

Les travaux sont finis 

En novembre en décembre,

On les voir réunis

Pour s’en aller ensemble.

Vous voyez ces enfants

La figure joyeuse

Pour revoir leurs parents

Au pays de la Creuse.

Winter brings happiness, 

Long country walks,

Time spent with sweethearts,

Intimate talks.

It’s cold and it’s dark

But the skies are all blue

For the girls who have got back

Their young men of Creuse.

 

Enfin, pendant l’hiver 

C’est leurs belles journées,

Ils vont se promener

Avec leurs bien-aimées.

Dans ces tristes saisons

Les filles sont heureuses

D’avoir dans leurs maisons

Les garçons de la Creuse.

This poem’s author – 

Well, he’s no famous bard.

Just one of the lads,

Who works and plays hard.

Contentedly living

The life that he’d choose

And proud to admit he’s

A mason of Creuse.

 

The beauties of Paris,

Like the great Panthéon,

The fine Tuilieries,

The Louvre and Odéon –

These beautiful buildings

Which make folk enthuse,

We owe them all to

The masons of Creuse.

 

 

L’auteur de la chanson 

Ce n’est pas un poète,

C’est un vieux compagnon

Buvant sa chopinette,

Toujours gai, bien content,

Trouvant la vie heureuse,

Et se vante gaiement

D’être ouvrier de la Creuse.

 

Voyez le Panthéon

Voyez les Tuileries,

Le Louvre et l’Odéon,

Le Palais d’Industrie,

De ces beaux monuments

La France est orgueilleuse,

On doit ces agréments

Aux ouvriers de la Creuse.